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Headlines & Links For Thursday, March 25th, 2010.


DANCING WITH THE STARS EDITION OF WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE (Read More)	“GOLDEN GLOBE AWARDS” TO TAKE PLACE SUNDAY, JANUARY 16, 2011 (Read More)	PERFORMERS FOR "45TH ANNUAL ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS" AIRING SUNDAY, APRIL 18 (Read More)

FANS SELECT SONG FOR BROOKS & DUNN'S FINAL PERFORMANCE ON THE "45TH ANNUAL ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS", APRIL 18, ON CBS       (Read More)

HOLLYWOOD SALUTES MATT DAMON: AN AMERICAN CINEMATHEQUE TRIBUTE       (Read More)

NBC RENEWS 'DAYS OF OUR LIVES' THROUGH 2010-11 SEASON       (Read More)

QUOTABLES FROM "LATE NIGHT WITH JIMMY FALLON" March 15 - March 19       (Read More)

THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Thoughts Going Through Harry Smith's Mind During His Televised Colonoscopy"       (Read More)

THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Things Overheard at the St. Patrick's Day Parade"       (Read More)

DANCING WITH THE STARS EDITION OF WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE

New York, N.Y., March 18th, 2010.               Tune in for the "Dancing with the Stars" Edition of "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" to see host Meredith Vieira cut a rug on the "Millionaire" set. The week-long specialty series will air March 29 - April 2. All week fans of the hit reality show will take to the "Millionaire" hot seat with a chance to walk away with $1-million. In addition to general trivia, contestants will also face questions about the "Dancing with the Stars" series, some of which will feature clips from the ABC show. Check local listings or go to www.millionairetv.com for more information.

"Dancing with the Stars" host Tom Bergeron will sit in as the Expert for the "Ask the Expert" lifeline all week and will be available on Skype to offer contestants assistance. Bergeron told contestants in advance that he felt comfortable helping to answer questions about pop culture, history, politics and celebrities, but that his areas of trivia weakness included literature, science and geography.

Meredith Vieira will get assistance delivering trivia questions to the contestants from the professional dancers featured on "Dancing with the Stars." Celebrity Questions will be asked by professional dancers Cheryl Burke, Mark Ballas, Lacey Schwimmer, Chelsie Hightower, Derek Hough and Maksim Chmerkovskiy, as well as judges Bruno Tonioli and Carrie Ann Inaba.

Hot seat contestants will also face Clip Questions, showcasing clips of memorable dances from celebrity dancers such as Drew Lachey, Emmitt Smith, Apolo Anton Ohno, Mario Lopez, Shannon Elizabeth, Helio Castroneves, Melanie Brown and Sabrina Bryan.

At the end of each episode, Meredith Vieira will join the contestants and studio audience for a dance party on the "Millionaire" set, complete with dance music and a dicso ball!

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“GOLDEN GLOBE AWARDS” TO TAKE PLACE SUNDAY, JANUARY 16, 2011

Beverly Hills, Ca., March 22nd, 2010.               Hollywood Foreign Press Association (HFPA) President, Philip Berk, today announced “The 68th Annual Golden Globe Awards” will air on NBC on Sunday, January 16, 2011 from 5-8 (PST) and 8-11 (EST) live from the Beverly Hilton Hotel.

Produced by Dick Clark Productions in association with the HFPA, The Golden Globes are viewed in more than 160 countries worldwide and is one of the few awards ceremonies to include both motion picture and television achievements. The 2010 show garnered a 14% audience increase from the previous year’s broadcast and delivered NBC’s biggest non-sports audience in the time period in six years.

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PERFORMERS ANNOUNCED FOR "45TH ANNUAL ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS" TO BE BROADCAST SUNDAY, APRIL 18

New York, N.Y., March 24tth, 2010.               Jason Aldean, Brooks & Dunn, Kenny Chesney, Lady Antebellum, host Reba McEntire, Blake Shelton & Trace Adkins, and Carrie Underwood are set to perform on the 45TH ANNUAL ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS, to be broadcast live from the MGM Grand in Las Vegas, Sunday, April 18 (8:00-11:00 PM, live ET/delayed PT) on the CBS Television Network. The special, produced for television by dick clark productions, honors country music's top talent as well as the industry's hottest emerging artists.

            Jason Aldean previously won Top New Male Vocalist in 2005. Additionally, he was nominated for Song of the Year and Video of the Year for "Amarillo Sky" in 2006.

            Brooks & Dunn are nominated for Top Vocal Duo of the Year. Kix Brooks and Ronnie Dunn of Brooks & Dunn, the best selling duo in the history of country music, will also receive the Academy's Milestone Award in recognition of their 20-year record-breaking career during the previously announced tribute concert special, "ACM PRESENTS: BROOKS & DUNN - THE LAST RODEO" to be broadcast Sunday, May 23 (8:00-10:00 PM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network. They will be honored for holding the record for the most wins of any artist in the Academy's history with 26 awards in total, including three Entertainer of the Year awards. They will also be honored for holding the record for most Top Vocal Duo wins, with 15 awards, eight of which are consecutive from 2000-2007.

            Kenny Chesney is nominated for four awards, including Entertainer of the Year and Top Male Vocalist. If he wins Entertainer of the Year, it will be his fifth win in the category. He is currently one of only three acts in Academy history to achieve four wins for Entertainer of the Year. He is also nominated as an artist and producer for Vocal Event of the Year for "I'm Alive," with multi-platinum recording artist Dave Matthews.

            Lady Antebellum led the Academy of Country Music Award nominations this year with seven nominations, including Album of the Year for Lady Antebellum and Top Vocal Group. In addition, Lady Antebellum was nominated for Single Record of the Year, Song of the Year and Video of the Year for "Need You Now." They were also nominated as a producer for Single Record of the Year and as a composer for Song of the Year.

            Reba McEntire will return to host the Academy of Country Music Awards for a record twelfth time. She is nominated for Top Female Vocalist of the Year. McEntire has won twelve Academy of Country Music Awards.

            Tim McGraw has won fifteen Academy of Country Music Awards, including the Career Achievement Award in 2006. He has been nominated nine times for Entertainer of the Year and his last win was for Vocal Event of the Year in 2007 for "Find Out Who Your Friends Are." McGraw released his current album, Southern Voice, in the fall of 2009.

            Blake Shelton and Trace Adkins are nominated for Vocal Event of the Year for "Hillbilly Bone." Shelton was previously nominated for Vocal Event of the Year for "The Truth About Men" in 2003. Shelton has also been nominated twice for Top Male Vocalist. Adkins is a previous winner of Top New Male Vocalist, and he has been nominated for two additional awards - in 2001 for Video of the Year for "I'm Tryin'" and in 2008 for Song of the Year for "You're Gonna Miss This."

            Carrie Underwood is nominated for six awards, including Entertainer of Year. Underwood is the reigning Entertainer of the Year, and if she wins that category again, she will be the first female in Academy history to capture two Entertainer of the Year trophies. Underwood is also nominated as an artist and composer for Song of the Year for "Cowboy Casanova" as well as Vocal Event of the Year for "I Told You So" with Randy Travis. In addition, Underwood is nominated for Top Female Vocalist and Album of the Year for Play On. If she wins Top Female Vocalist, it will be the fourth consecutive year she has won the category. Underwood also won the 2006 Album of the Year for Some Hearts.

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FANS SELECT SONG FOR BROOKS & DUNN'S FINAL PERFORMANCE ON THE "45TH ANNUAL ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS", APRIL 18, ON CBS

New York, N.Y., March 24tth, 2010.               Brooks & Dunn, the best-selling duo in the history of country music, will perform one of their hit songs as voted on by their fans on the 45^TH ANNUAL ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS, to be broadcast live from the MGM Grand in Las Vegas, Sunday, April 18 (8:00-11:00 PM, live ET/delayed PT) on the CBS Television Network. The duo is embarking on their final tour together this summer, and this will mark their final ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS performance as a duo.

            Beginning today, viewers can log onto www.cbs.com/brooksdunn to vote in two phases for one of their six favorite Brooks & Dunn songs:

My Maria

Brand New Man

Red Dirt Road

Neon Moon

You're Gonna Miss Me

Boot Scootin' Boogie

            There is no registration to vote, and fans may vote one time per day. Additionally, a 30-second clip of each song is available for listening. Phase one voting begins Wednesday, March 24 at 2:59 PM, ET/11:59 AM, PT. The second phase begins on Wednesday, April 14 at 2:59 PM, ET/11:59 AM, PT, when the list narrows down to the top three songs. Fans may again vote at www.cbs.com/brooksdunn to decide which hit song the duo will perform on the broadcast. Voting will continue up until Brooks & Dunn's final live performance as a duo on the 45^TH ANNUAL ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS on Sunday, April 18.

            Brooks & Dunn are nominated for Top Vocal Duo of the Year at this year's ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS. Kix Brooks and Ronnie Dunn of Brooks & Dunn will also receive the Academy's Milestone Award in recognition of their 20-year record-breaking career during the previously announced tribute concert special, "ACM PRESENTS: BROOKS & DUNN - THE LAST RODEO," to be broadcast Sunday, May 23 (8:00-10:00 PM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network. They will be honored for holding the record for the most wins of any artist in the Academy's history with 26 awards in total, including three Entertainer of the Year awards. They will also be honored for holding the record for most Top Vocal Duo wins, with 15 awards, eight of which are consecutive from 2000-2007.

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HOLLYWOOD SALUTES MATT DAMON: AN AMERICAN CINEMATHEQUE TRIBUTE

Los Angeles, Ca., March 22nd, 2010.               Ben Affleck to Present Matt Damon with the 24th American Cinematheque Award. Don Cheadle, President William Jefferson Clinton, George Clooney, Clint Eastwood, Jimmy Kimmel, Greg Kinnear, Ben Stiller, Charlize Theron and Robin Williams to Pay Tribute to Matt Damon at Gala Event on March 27 at the Beverly Hilton

Tribute to Air at a Later Date Exclusively on ABC Ben Affleck will present his longtime friend and co-star, Matt Damon, with the 24th American Cinematheque Award at the Cinematheque's annual benefit gala on Saturday, March 27, 2010 at the Beverly Hilton Hotel's International Ballroom in Beverly Hills. The award presentation concludes an evening of in-person tributes from Damon's colleagues, Casey Affleck, Don Cheadle, Clint Eastwood, Jimmy Kimmel, Greg Kinnear, Charlize Theron and Robin Williams. In addition, George Clooney and Ben Stiller will pay tribute by partaking in individual pre-taped comedy sketches, while President William Jefferson Clinton appears in and narrates a piece surrounding Damon's humanitarian efforts that will be played during the show. Added guests will be announced as they are confirmed.

ABC will premiere the Award Show broadcast of "Hollywood Salutes Matt Damon: An American Cinematheque Tribute" at a later date. This is the 1st year that ABC will broadcast the show. Damon was the unanimous choice of the Cinematheque Board of Directors selection committee which, since 1986, has annually honored an extraordinary artist (actor, director or writer) in the entertainment industry who is fully engaged in his or her work and is committed to making a significant contribution to the art of the motion picture.

The American Cinematheque Award is presented annually to an extraordinary artist currently making a significant contribution to the art of the Moving Picture and is a mid-career achievement honor. Proceeds from the event go towards the year round operation of the American Cinematheque's public programming at the Egyptian and Aero Theatres in Los Angeles.

Eddie Murphy received the first American Cinematheque Award in 1986. Previous honorees are Bette Midler (1987), Robin Williams (1988), Steven Spielberg (1989), Ron Howard (1990), Martin Scorsese (1991), Sean Connery (1992), Michael Douglas (1993), Rob Reiner (1994), Mel Gibson (1995), Tom Cruise (1996), John Travolta (1997), Arnold Schwarzenegger (1998), Jodie Foster (1999), Bruce Willis (2000), Nicolas Cage (2001), Denzel Washington (2002), Nicole Kidman (2003), Steve Martin (2004), Al Pacino (2005), George Clooney (2006), Julia Roberts (2007) and Samuel L. Jackson (2008).

One thousand entertainment industry notables are expected to attend the tribute. This annual event is the American Cinematheque's most important benefit, providing funds for the non-profit film exhibition organization's programs throughout the year and operation of the historic landmark Egyptian Theatre on Hollywood Boulevard, as well as the Aero Theatre in Santa Monica on Montana Avenue.

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NBC RENEWS 'DAYS OF OUR LIVES' THROUGH 2010-11 SEASON

Universal City, Ca., March 19th, 2010.               NBC has picked up hit daytime drama "Days of our Lives" for its 45th season, keeping the long-running show on the network through the 2010-11 television season, it was announced today by Marc Graboff, Chairman, NBC Entertainment and Universal Media Studios.

"'Days of our Lives' continues to be a favorite of the daytime audience and we are thrilled to keep it going through its 45th season," said Graboff. "'Days' has shown year-to-year increases in key female demographics and remains both relevant and fresh creatively."

Bruce Evans, Senior Vice President, Drama Programming, NBC Entertainment, added, "The producers, cast and crew have worked tirelessly to make 'Days' the ratings success it is today. Today's renewal is a true testament to all of their hard work. We could not be more delighted for them and for the multiple generations of fiercely loyal 'Days of our Lives' fans."

The acclaimed daytime drama will celebrate its 45th anniversary on Monday, November 8.

"Days of our Lives" first premiered as a half-hour drama in 1965 and expanded to an hour 10 years later. Today, it remains a consistent favorite among viewers of daytime television serials and is currently tied for #2 for the season among all daytime dramas in women 18-49 and women 18-34. Through 25 weeks of the 2009-10 season, "Days" is averaging 3.3 million viewers, its highest average at this point in the season in three years and a 10 percent increase over its audience of one year ago, according to Nielsen Media Research. "Days" is also delivering year-to-year gains among women 18-49 and women 25-54.

In its 44-plus years, "Days of our Lives" has garnered numerous Emmy Awards and nominations, as well as multiple Soap Opera Digest and People's Choice Awards. "Days of our Lives" is set in the fictitious Midwestern town of Salem. The core families are the Bradys, the Hortons and the DiMeras, and the multi-layered storylines involve elements of romance, adventure, mystery, comedy and drama.

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QUOTABLES FROM "LATE NIGHT WITH JIMMY FALLON" March 15 - March 19

"You guys feeling good tonight? Listen to this. On Saturday, the Chicago River was dyed green in honor of St. Patrick's Day. Also in honor of St. Patrick's Day, New York's East River will remain green."

"There's a lot going on in Washington. In his weekly radio and Internet address, President Obama called for an overhaul of the "No Child Left Behind" law. It will now be called, "The World Needs Janitors Too."

"President Obama talked about healthcare reform at a senior center in Strongsville, Ohio today. The most common question he got, "When's bingo?"

"I don't know if you saw this, yesterday on "Meet the Press," Tom Brokaw referred to health care reform as a "kerfuffle." If you thought passing health care was hard, trust me-it's ten times harder for Brokaw to pronounce "kerfuffle."

"New York Governor David Paterson is still under fire. In his new interview, Governor Paterson said he hired a criminal defense lawyer not because he's guilty of anything, but to get "the best possible advice." Yeah, that sounds believable. That's like telling your girlfriend you got an STD test just because you were bored."

"Oh, check this out. A "J. Crew" store here in New York is in trouble for not hiring transgender people. They're denying it - they're saying it's just a case of he/she said - she/he said."

"You guys excited for March Madness? My favorite part is actually seeing the different mascots. You know, the kids under those costumes are like, "We did it! We did it!" And the players are like, "Uhhh, WE did it. You dressed up like an orange."

"And have you heard about this? There's a new program called "HuddleHub" that manages all of your fantasy sports teams. Yeah, they call it the perfect solution for someone who's too lazy to keep track of being too lazy to play actual sports."

"There's been some crazy weather, huh? The storm here was so bad that some New Jersey residents had to evacuate due to concerns over flooding. Experts say water levels haven't risen this fast in New Jersey since the last time Snooki got into a hot tub."

"Finally, in May, Germany is going to open an 11-mile hiking trail for people who want to hike in the nude. Well, it's 11 miles long, but guys are bragging that it's 13."

"You guys psyched for March Madness? Who here has filled out a March Madness tournament bracket? I'm a perfectionist, so I like to fill it out AFTER the tournament."

"I love watching students cheer on their schools. It must be great seeing your kid drunk and shirtless on TV with their school colors painted on their chest. Dad's like, "Well, what can I say - she's my daughter and I love her."

"As you know, the NCAA Tournament whittles the field down from 65 to 32 to 16 to 8 to 4 teams to 2 to 1. It's a lot like "American Idol," except the winner doesn't have to spend the next 5 years signing autographs at the mall."

"Did you hear about this? Mike Tyson is going to star in a new show on Animal Planet about the sport of pigeon racing. So at least we've finally answered the question, "What planet is Mike Tyson on?"

"I don't even know what to make of this. A woman in Britain used the fat on her stomach to grow her own breast implants. So the next time someone calls you fat, just say, "Hey, it's not fat. It's future-boob."

"Listen to this. Facebook is going to open its first offices in India. Yeah, Indian Facebook is a little different. Under "Help," it just says "Seriously? You live in India. You fix it yourself."

"Actually, a new study found that Facebook now is the most popular website in the U.S. And hey, MySpace is still the 30th most popular website at MySpace headquarters."

"Did you guys see the GQ pictures of John Edwards' mistress, Rielle Hunter? Today she called them "repulsive" and said she trusted GQ's photographer to take classy photos. Yeah, cuz anytime I'm on a bed in nothing but a dress shirt and underwear, next to a Dora the Explorer doll, I think: this is gonna look CLASSY!"

"Check this out. C-SPAN is uploading 23 years of video on the Internet. Or, if you want to get the sensation of watching 23 years of C-SPAN, just watch 2 minutes of C-SPAN."

"This is pretty interesting. A new study found that dancing comes naturally to babies. Their favorite place to "get their freak on?" All up in their crib."

"And finally, Spencer Pratt is leaving "The Hills" to study software engineering at USC. Producers of "The Hills" called it a "huge blow," while the president of USC called it a "huge blow."

"How are you guys feeling tonight? Happy St. Patrick's Day! It was a beautiful day here in New York for the St. Patrick's Day parade - over 60 degrees outside! I guess it's just that old "Luck o' the Global Warming."

"Interesting fact: In Ireland, St. Patrick's Day is meant to honor St. Patrick, who drove out all the snakes. Kind of like how here in America, we honor St. Samuel L. Jackson."

"And as you know, in Irish lore, leprechauns hide their pots of gold at the end of the rainbow. But here in New York, things are a little different - at the end of the rainbow, there's just a gay bar."

"Here's some political news for you guys, today, Ohio Congressman Dennis Kucinich announced that he will vote for President Obama's health care bill. The one condition is that Obama had to carry him on his shoulders so he could see the St. Patrick's Day Parade."

"This is pretty big. Top officials believe that Kim Jong-il is going to die in the next 3 years. I was gonna send him something, but Hallmark was all out of their "Heard experts are predicting your death" cards. It's in the Shoebox Collection."

"You guys excited for March Madness? Congratulations to the Arkansas-Pine Bluff Golden Lions, who beat Winthrop in the opening round of the NCAA tournament. Now they get the great honor of being blown out by Duke on Friday."

"Listen to this guys, there's a new iPhone app for doctors that takes them through a checklist of how to treat a heart attack patient. It's expected to sell well, but not as well as their other app, "list of doctors to avoid because they downloaded the 'heart attack app."

"Finally, President Obama went on Fox News tonight to pitch his plan for health care reform. Obama going on Fox News??? That's like John Edwards going on "The Marriage Ref."

"Are you guys feeling good tonight!? Oh man. It's March Madness AND we have Gene Simmons the show tonight. I don't know about you, but I've never had more of an urge to paint my face."

"You guys excited for March Madness? We've had some great match-ups so far, BYU vs. Florida. Old Dominion vs. Notre Dame. Obama vs. Fox News."

"This is pretty cool. One of President Obama's childhood friends just found a photo of Obama as a schoolboy taken more than 40 years ago. Yeah, it's just him and some kids, playing little Barack's favorite schoolyard game, "Give the Speech."

"I don't know if you guys knew this, but Obama was a great ball player when he was a kid. But naturally, the other team never let him pass anything."

"Check this out. A Wal-Mart employee in Michigan was fired after he tested positive for medical marijuana. Yeah, customers at his store were like, "I knew the official greeting wasn't 'Wassup bro?'"

"This is bad. Blockbuster said it might have to file for bankruptcy if it can't pay off its debts. Which means my strategy of holding on to "Air Bud 2: Golden Receiver" for nine years just might pay off."

"There was some big Tiger Woods news today. One-hundred explicit text messages from Tiger to a porn star were posted on the Internet. In one text, Tiger wrote, "I would wear you out." I know, right? The only time I've ever said "I would wear you out" was when I was talking to a sweater I really liked at Macy's. "I would wear you out. I'd wear you right outta this store."

"Speaking of dirty text messages, two flight attendants in the United Arab Emirates were sentenced to 3 months in jail for sending each other sexy text messages. It was really filthy: He said he was in the "upright position," then she said "would you like to sit in my exit row," then he said, "sorry I just boarded early."

"How are you guys feeling tonight, you feeling good? You enjoying March Madness? I'm so pumped for this weekend. My friends are coming over-we're gonna pound some beers, paint our faces, and watch the health care vote go down on C-Span."

"I've been watching the NCAA Tournament, and there've been some huge upsets. In fact, sports writers said Ohio's win over Georgetown was the first time a #14 seed beat a #3 seed since 2006. Since 2006? Is that such a huge deal? It's like "Dude, you don't understand, the last time this happened, 'LOST' was on TV, Beyonce was popular, it was like, crazy stuff."

"Some movie news. "Repo Men" came out today, starring Jude Law as a guy who rips out your internal organs if you can't pay for them. Or as we call that in the U.S. - your insurance company."

"Speaking of health insurance, the Democrats are working overtime to get 216 votes to pass health care on Sunday. Which means Rahm Emanuel is prowling the showers like the head of a prison gang."

"Here's some good medical news. There's a new technique that lets doctors perform kidney transplants in 45 minutes. 'Cause when you're getting a kidney transplant, your main concern is always "How long is this gonna take? Can you do it in less than an hour? 'Cause I've got to watch the Glee repeat."

"This is pretty crazy. I just read about a retirement home in Mexico that caters exclusively to older prostitutes. And you thought you hated visiting YOUR grandmother."

"It's rough over there. Whenever the residents win bingo money, they have to pay 70 percent to a pimp."

"Listen to this. In California, a 9-year-old boy and an 11-year-old girl helped deliver their baby brother when their mother unexpectedly went into labor. The daughter says she's glad she was able to help, and the son, he hasn't said much since the most horrifying day of his life."

"Here's a weird story. A man in Switzerland escaped from a transsexual brothel after a fire forced him to jump out the window. He was released with minor injuries and went home to his wife and experienced MAJOR injuries."

"And finally, Time Warner officials in North Carolina have apologized for mistakenly airing previews for the Playboy Channel on 2 children's networks. Kids watching TV at the time were shocked to learn just how much "exploring" Dora was into."

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THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Thoughts Going Through Harry Smith's Mind During His Televised Colonoscopy"

As presented by Harry Smith, co-anchor of CBS News' "The Early Show," on the Monday, March 22 broadcast

10.       "Ow"

9.         "Good morning, America."

8.         "For those watching in high definition, you're welcome."

7.         "Found my car keys."

6.         "Now I know how Conan felt."

5.         "Read the card, read the card."

4.         Not to change the subject, but has Jesse James lost his mind?

3.         "I thought I was signing up for a live interview with Colin Powell."

2.         "You're watching the Tiffany Network."

1.         "Between me and Letterman, you can't turn on CBS without seeing an ass."

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THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Things Overheard at the St. Patrick's Day Parade"

As presented on the Wednesday, March 17 broadcast

10.       "Oh, I had no idea the Irish were such big drinkers."

9.         "Look away, kids."

8.         "Hey, a leprechaun. Oh, sorry Mayor."

7.         "How did I get here?"

6.         "I thought this was a ‘Fire Dave Letterman' rally."

5.         "Where are my pants?"

4.         "Oh no, liver exploded."

3.         "How did I get here and where are my pants?"

2.         "When do they drop the ball?"

1.         "Obama better pass health care because I'm gonna be sick as hell tomorrow."

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